So much good--and a bit of sadness

Story Circle Network has named me a Star Blogger. They praised me for blogging about life stuff that comes my way in an in-the-moment style and said I'd given myself permission to stick a piece of tape across my editor-self's mouth and ramble from idea to idea. I think that means what I've always thought--my blog is disorganized, sort of stream of consciousness, the kind of fiction I don't like to read but maybe in a blog it's okay. I hope you all think so. I will eventually get a "badge" to put on my blog but in the meantime it was featured today in the national SCN newsletter that came in my email. SCN is an international network designed to encourage women to write about their lives--and it's the basis of the most rewarding course that I teach on Thursday nights on my front porch. Teach? Shoot, the women themselves teach it by sharing. Wonderful experience. Not sure if you can read the newsletter if you're not a member of SCN, but here's the URL: http://www.storycircle.org/eletters.shtml#national.
Today I was happily and busily working, mostly on compiling a file of my short storycollection so I could send it to my agent, Roger Williams of Publish or Perish, to put on Kindle. Now I'm proofreading it and finding mistakes I guess were in the printed version but I hope not. Sort of fun to read those stories again, because I still like them, egotistical though that sounds. I also sent off for printing the new stuff on my  Blue Plate Cafe mystery so I can give it to Fred Friday to read and a segment I wrote for class Thursday night on anxiety disorder. And spent a lot of time on emails--the Sisters in Crime  and Agent Quest lists are always much busier on Mondays, it seems. So even though my lunch pal got mixed up and forgot me, I had a really pleasant, busy day.
Tonight, I had dinner with good friends Kathie Allen and Carol Roark--we mostly talked about university presses (Kathie is senior editor at SMU Press, which is in a great deal of jeopardy, and we also talked about the new director of TCU Press and Carol is a frequent contributor to TCU Press, so it's an interest we all have in common). Then we talked Carol's trip to Portugal, aging parents, and other depressing topics, but we had a good visit. Ate at Piola, where we all had piccata--veal for Kathie and me, chicken for Carol--with asparagus risotto. Absolutely delicious. A pleasant evening. And it rained tonight and turned blessedly cool--when I went to water porch plants about 5:15, it was in the upper 70s and I wished I was cooking a porch dinner for the ladies.
The note of sadness: Megan had to put down her Tsi Shu--Jackson was I think sixteen or seventeen, but it seems like she's had him forever. He had gotten so his back legs wouldn't support him, and he'd fall, couldn't get up. But he was the sweetiest bad smelling dog I ever knew--he loved to be cuddled, but a day after he was bathed, he smelled bad again. Never did figure that out. But I knew the last few times that I saw him that he was pretty miserable, blind in one eye from poor vet care among other things. It's such a hard decision to make, but it's one I've made too many times in my life. My heart's with Meg tonight--but then it always is.

Writing Your Life

Tonight, my class on Writing Your Life met on my front porch--I think this was their fourth meeting, and they are really coalescing into a tight-knit group. I've found this happens with other small groups of women who meet regularly--they bond as sisters. It happened with the contributors to Grace & Gumption: Stories of Fort Worth Women and to the cookbook that will follow in a month or so. But it probably happens more often with this group where we share intimate details of our lives. I contributed an essay for general consumption tonight called "The Horseless Carriage," about how I felt about being single at 71 and the men I've loved in my life. One longtime friend praised me for my openness but said, "This just isn't the Judy Alter I've known as director of TCU Press." Others shared equally unknown secrets, and we laughed over the cookbook chapter of one member who recalled the '60s when we all drank cocktails--remember Gimlets and Manhattans and Salty Dogs (if you served my brother a Manhattan, he used to say, "Say good night to me now."). My parents drank a lot of Manhattans when I was young, but I am sure one would do me under the table now. And Old-Fashioneds--my, how I loved them. Haven't had one in years. At the end of the session, we always have a circle and ask how each person is feeling--some said "Better," some said "Tired," and I said, "Freedom." It's a really rewarding experience, and the ladies seem to enjoy it a great deal.
I've also written 700 words on my mystery today, which feels like an accomplishment. When I read it last night, it wasn't as dull as I thought, and today I inserted an incident in earlier text to heighten the suspense and then went on to write the 700 new words, which I feel is a pretty good accomplishment for a day.
Had a thoroughly enjoyable lunch with Elizabeth, usually my co-partner in this evening's class, though she asked to be excused tonight because she really wanted to write on her memoir project and had some things she wanted to get down on paper. I know that feeling and willingly agreed. I hope she'll share with us next week. I should mention that the class is inspired by the Story Circle Network (look for it on Google) although not many members have joined the network.
The Sisters in Crime listserv has had a lot of posts in the last few days about gender language and discrimination--I think the general conclusion is that pronouns and whether God is he or she don't matter much, but the condition of women in  underprivileged countries matters a lot. I thought about that tonight, with a group of educated, middle-class, economically comfortable women sitting around me telling their life stories. Some of us do indeed have hardships to recount--the loss of a child, physical abuse, physical ailments--but these all pale in the face of what women in other cultures face. We should be grateful. But it also occurs to me that men wouldn't be involved in a group like the one that met on my porch tonight--okay, this may be a generalization,but I am drawn back to the now-old book, Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus, which contends that women want to talk about things; men simply want to solve the problem. I still believe it.

Weighty matters and guilty pleasures

A huge load dropped off my shoulders today. I quit WeightWatchers. I'm not criticizing the program at all. Indeed, it helped me lose, at one point, 14 lbs, though now it's only eight. But it also helped me shed some bad, indulgent habits, and now I do measure and weigh food and drink. I don't eat ice cream with chocolate sauce at night, nor bread slathered with butter. But as those of you who've followed the blog know, I was compulsive about points. About two weeks ago I spent a week coming in below my allotted points (19, which is not many) and way above on my exercise points--and still gained over a pound. I decided it was foolish of me. At my age, I should be eating the things I enjoy. I happened to have a doctor's appt. today, and discussed it with him. He said my weight is just about right for my age and height and gave me a 10-lb. range to stay within. His advice: eat what you enjoy, but do it in moderation, with modest helpings. I knew all along I wasn't overweight, but I just kept dreading what would happen. Strangely, since I quit paying such strict attention I have maintained a cosntant weight. But now I feel liberated. I will weigh once a week, watch what's happening, and adjust accordingly. And I'll still eat a lot of tuna fish.
But I've decided I'm compulsive in another area--the guilty pleasure of reading. Guilty only because it keeps me from doing other work. I'm reviewing a book for the Story Circle Network--when it arrived and I looked through it, I came near yawning. But last night I got into it, enjoyed it a lot, and now I've not put it down. And I've not worked on my novel, though I did go to a meeting at the office this morning--I don't procrastinate on that business, just on my own writing. A sign of insecurity, I'm sure.

Are You Ready for Winter to End?

I think this is the endless winter. Cold rain and wind today, although the predicted snow flurries didn't seem to materialize unless I missed them hiding in my house. I heard that we can expect the possibility of snow for three more weeks, which is really weird--we always say March 15 is the safe date for planting, when there will be no more freezes, but not this year! It was the kind of day you want to hide in your bed all day and forget the world, though I did get out for lunch with Fred Erisman. We decided it was also a perfect day for split pea soup at Carshon's, though he chose lentil. We had a pleasant visit, discussed projects we're both working on, and talked about what worries us--tea parties and other things--but didn't solve the world's problems.
Other than that, I've really had a working day. The manuscript I thought I got off yesterday came back to bite me as I suspected it would--had to redo some notes and re-check one of the longer chapters. I think this may go on for a while. But I got an excerpt from a novel off to our editorial board, proposed a class on doing your own cookbook to Story Circle Network, and read most of a neighbor's manuscript. Will finish that off tonight and write up some notes for her.
Tomorrow is supposed to be sunny and much warmer,and I have a bit of work to do at the office and a lunch date, so I'll get out. Last week I was too much of a recluse!

Be patient, Juju, be patient!

One recent night when I had put an parchment packet with spinach, mushrooms, and egg in the oven to bake, Jacob decided he had to have his pajamas before dinner. I kept telling him my dinner was over-cooking, and he kept saying, "Be patient, Juju, be patient." Result? One really hard egg, when I like them runny and soft. I wanted to tell Jacob he was saying that to the wrong person--I am not by nature a patient person,. But I've decided the writer's life requires some patience. Today I was supposed to get the return of an author's comment on an edited manuscript, so I can get it back to Texas Tech Press on time. It didn't come, and Fed Ex now says tomorrow, no matter that it was designated yesterday for overnight delivery. Does snow throw Austin off that much? The snow in Fort Worth was a fizzle--lots of tiny flakes that came down fairly heavily but melted as soon as they hit the ground. In Austin, apparently, it was a different story--lots of heavy, wet, big snowflakes. In Fort Worth, all we had was a really damp cold that got into your bones. No picturesque scenes like last week--and that's probably a blessing.
Anyway, the manuscript didn't come, and I'm not about to dig into my own manuscript only to have to abandon it tomorrow for the other project. So I'm left trying to be patient--and to develop a proposal for Story Cicrle Network for a class on writing cookbooks. Now that I've done one, I'm an expert--really? In medicine, we used to laugh about docs whose apparent model was, "See one, do one, teach one." But I do have lots of ideas, including some things I would have done differently. But for now I'm being patient and losing myself in Susan Wittig Albert's novel, Spanish Dagger.
There is a food side to my day. Betty and I went to The Covey, a restaurant/brewery. I had lunched there a long time ago and not been impressed, but Jeannie said she had appetizers there recently and they were wonderful. She was so right! We split miniature lobster tacos, with chicken-fried lobster, and crab cakes. Absolutely delicious. Then we split a pear/Gorgonzola salad with field greens and dried cranberries--do you realize what dried cranbierries do for a salad? This one had a raspberry vinaigrette, and while I don't usually enjoy semi-sweet salad dressings, I loved this one. We both agreed we'll go back there, for lunch as well as supper.
A line I read in an e-mail today: Depression is just anger without enthusiasm. I love that!

Now, what was on my mind . . . ?

Today was a stay-at-home day. My lunch plan cancelled, and I dug in and read a novel in manuscript that had been submitted to TCU Press. Feel like I've had a crash in driving a long-haul truck, but it was interesting stuff. In the afternoon I took a nap, and as I drifted off, I had a great thought about what I was going to blog about tonight, something philosophical and deep. Alas, when I woke up the thought was gone.
But I spent much of the evening exploring the Story Circle Network web site--since 1997, the SCN has been offering online classes to help women write about various aspects of their lives. The SCN was the brainchild of Susan Wittig Albert, a multi-faceted writer who does mysteries (the China Bayles herb series) but also wrote a book called Writing from Life. I taught non-credit classes from that book two or three times, probably almost 15 years ago, and they were a hoot. Some women still come up to me to say they were in one of the classes and how much they enjoyed it. Writing from life is like loosening the flood gates to release thoughts, experiences, and so forth that you've kept bottled up inside. Today, it's sort of like blogging, and one of the classes they suggest is on blogging. Check it out yourself at http://www.storycirclenetwork.org/.
I decided it would be fun to teach a class for them, but when I explored their proposal site I found it was a lot more complicated than just checking a "Yes, I want to teach" box. You have to come up with a course outline, synopsis, methodology, etc. So I'm going to study on it for a few days. Susan Wittig Albert suggested I might like to teach a "kitchen table" class--compiling a cookbook, since I've done that in Cooking My Way Through Life with Kids and Books. I like the idea. I also like the idea of teaching a short course on blogging. I could get some help from Sue, my soon-to-be ex-neighbor, who follows a wide variety of blogs plus writes an interesting one--google A Replete Life for Sue's take on the world.
Anyway, I feel that exploring the SCN website has led me to another new, and quite complex, world of social networking, and I like it. Paid my dues tonight. Going to explore more on classes to suggest, but I can always write about food.
Snow tomorrow. Don't know if it will be another homebound day or not. Betty and I are supposed to go to dinner,but we'll see. Which reminds me, I have the television on but muted, glancing every once in a while at the ski jumping. It is purely amazing what some of those athletes can do. I'm not a fan of watching sports on TV, even the Olympics, but this surely draws my attention.