Thursday, April 09, 2015

Oh my goodness! A week of "those days"

It has been the week that was. I did report that I went to an antique mall on Monday--what I didn't report was that I was a bundle of anxiety the whole time, with extreme symptoms from shaky hands to things we don't need to talk about. Tuesday morning I woke anxious but suddenly mid-morning I felt a sense of calm--I call it a convergence between medication and God's grace. I knew that I had broken the back of this particular anxiety spell--which at more than a week had gone on way too long.
But the Lord wasn't through with me. One of the things my physical therapist recommended was a portable seat heater in the car--plugs in to the charger holder. I needed heat for 15 minutes--takes me 20 to get to my daughter's house, so I turned it on both going and coming Sunday night. And left it plugged in! Realized Monday morning and rushed out to unplug it. Started the car and it was fine--I'm just not smart enough to know that I should have left it running for 30 minutes.
Tuesday, I had a wonderful, laughing happy lunch with Melinda, from my former officemate--we really enjoy our outings! But Tuesday night when I got into the car to go to supper, the battery was dead. Friends picked me up, and I enjoyed supper, planning to worry about the battery the next day.
Wed. Jordan dropped me at Physical Therapy for my first real session--and I'm here to tell you it's tiring. An hour and a quarter that begins with soothing heat and ultrasound and then progresses to endless gentle exercises--gentle but cumulative. I did learn the proper way to use my cane--though it sure feels awkward. The good news is that my back pain is less, and my balance may be a scosh better. I have ten sessions to go, and I think this is going to help.
My insurance roadside service fixed the car promptly--the gentlemen opened the hood of the car, and I called, "Oh, no! It's under the back seat." His gentle reply was something to the effect of "I'm looking at it." He got it started and instructed me to leave it run for 30 minutes--I was working so didn't particularly want to drive around for 30 minutes. I pulled it to one side of the driveway and locked the gate, but it made me nervous. Not sure where I got the idea it was under the back seat--maybe my last VW?
All's well that ends well--nobody stole the car, and this morning it turned over promptly to get me to the grocery. Yes, I was a tad nervous about going to the grocery--like a first outing by myself since a couple of bad anxiety attacks, but I can tell the difference in how I feel. Well-meaning friends (and my child) have suggested that when I freeze trying to walk down the driveway or across the parking lot I just pump my legs up and down. They don't understand freeze means freeze. I simply can't. But today I can. It will take a bit to recover lost territory, but I'm on my way. Praise be! I am so grateful.


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