Happy Birthday, Jamie.

James Andrew Alter turned forty today. I'm having a hard time with this. He's my second son, third child. Three now have hit the forty mark. I know all parents feel this way, but it seems only yesterday he was dragging a cat by the tail and saying, "This is muh pet." That cat remained "Muh Pet" the rest of her life and when she once scratched him, I asked, "What did you do to Muh Pet?" Reply: "I hammered her." HIs birthday has set me to thinking about incidents and sayings from all my child-rearing years, with all four children. Happy as I am with my life now, I sometimes long for those days.Yes, they were hectic and I was exhausted most of the time, but we were all five happy people.
When I said by email to Jamie today that I carry a lot of happy memories, he replied that he had a lot of his own. We'll share someday, but I know all my children have those memories. They love to play the game of "Remember the time . . .?"
In the picture above of my family, taklen at my 70th birthday, Jamie is on the far right with his hand on his daughter's shoulder. Colin is in the back on my left and Megan on my right; Jordan is kneeling in front.
We normally make a big deal of decade-changing birthdays but we were all together at Christmas and will be again in early February when everyone arrives for the rodeo and stock show. I'd love to have a gathering of the clan to celebrate Jamie this weekend, but we'll do it at stock show time. I remember one year cooking his favorite meal--prime rib--but there are so many of us now there's no way I could afford prime rib for sixteen. I bet we end up with barbecue or chicken-fried steak or, heaven forbid, tacos from Ernesto's when we do celebrate.
I remember better when my brother turned forty than I do when I did. He and his much younger wife were visiting, and I wrote "40" in shaving cream on every mirror in the house. He lost patience. I won't say how many years ago that was, for fear he'd lose patience again. But I think when I turned forty, it wasn't a happy time in my life. For Jamie, it's a happy, good time with a wonderful family, a good business, an active exercise life, and--always--a bit of trickery and fun. He can still prank call me successfully.
So tonight, I'll raise a glass of wine in toast to Jamie, and he'll raise his Diet Coke back at me from Frisco. And then I'll make a second toast to my three other wonderful children, one of whom thank goodness is still in her thirties--okay, late thirties, but we won't quibble. Oops, I'm getting sentimental here. 'Nuf said.

A long day but a wonderful dinner

All my days have been long this week, since the arrival of Sophie.  She's now contentedly chewing on my shoes. I know it's a horrible precedent, but I'm letting her because they're so stretched out and awful I can't keep them on my feet, and I have new replacements. But if she goes after the new shoes, we'll have a discussion. I seem to spend my days saying "No" to electrical cords, throws and rugs with fringes, etc. Nothing daunts her.
However, Scooby continues to be afraid, and I continue to put them together in the evening, even if only for an hour. I pet and love Scooby the whole time he's in the office with her. I've had to move my wicker chair out of the office every time I bring Sophie in here because she chews on it--which could be fatal. But the worst is that she jumped out of her playpen three times today. Breeder suggests some kind of netting, which I think is a good idea. This weekend, we'll change the wicker chair for the overstuffed one in my bedroom--the plaid throw can go on the overstuffed chair without dragging on the floor and tempting Li'l Bit, as I sometims call her. She is so full of life and happy she's just irresistible.
The cat is another big problem--I think his body is shutting down. He ate very little yesterday and peed less, ate nothing today. Tonight when I came home from dinner I took care of the older animals first--put Scooby in the office with treats, picked up Wywy to get his food out of the fridge. He peed all over the kitchen floor and me (while I was holding him), then yowled when I put him on his counter for food and seemed to stagger a moment. I'm afraid the inevitable is coming. Jordan had a cat that got so weak and bad that Christian finally persuaded her they would have to put it to sleep the next day--the cat died in her sleep that night. I wish such an end for Wywy--I hate to make that decision, but I don't want him to suffer.
Bright note in my day: Betty, Jeannie and I celebrated our June/July birthdays with dinner at Taverna, an Italian restaurant I'd not been to before. We had a wonderful, seasoned flatbread for an appetizer, then each had starters--they both had shrimp (I swear they do that because they know I can't eat it) and I had carpaccio, which I can never resist. This came with paper thin slices of pecorino and a salad of greens with a creamy dressing and lots of capers. Wonderful. I had a flourless chocolate cake with a molten chocolate center set on zabaglione (there wasn't much of it) and raspberry sauce--just four little dots on the plate, but it was all good. Now I'm full and happy. Scooby having endured an hour in the office with Sophie is happily in his bed, and Wywy has slunk off somewhere. I'll have to go look for him and love on him.
Is it any wonder that when I took a nap today I really, really didn't want to get up?

Turning 72 isn't at all bad!

What a lovely birthday I had! Started the day with a podiatrist appointment--okay, not so lovely, but he's a nice guy and assures me I'll lose the toenail I stubbed but the new one will gradually push it out. But went from there to Jordan's office where I sat and visited withs ome of her colleagues briefly and then we went to lunch at Patrizio's, long a favorite of mine in Highland Park Village. I'm delighted now that it's opened in FW. I had a great salad. Jordan wanted the fried warm goat cheese and I was tempted, but it's breaded so I passed. She said, "Please, it's your birthday!" and the waiter said, "No, leave her alone." (Good guy--I gave him a generous tip!) We did share a chocolate mousse but about three bites did me in--so rich.

They were replacing my furnace/a/c unit today, a most expensive birthday present I gave myself out of necessity. I would have preferred something less expensive and more frivolous, but we do what we have to. I came home to a really warm if not hot house, turned on the a/c in the guest house, and did a bit of work, got in a short nap in the guest house (which never did really cool down in that time). Then off to a reception at TCU Press which honored Dr. Dan Williams as the incoming director and me as the outgoing, plus made a big deal of my birthday, with balloons and a cake. Once gain, gluten in mind, I resisted the cake while urging others to eat it. It was double chocolate fudge and looked wonderful, but I figure if I'm going to try this gluten-free experiment, I have to be pretty wholehearted about it.
Came home again to a hot house--I am so grateful to Jason and Donald from Rhinefort & Co.. They put in a long hard day--Donald didn't leave until almost 8:30. But I didn't stay long--Jeannie, Betty and I celebrated our joint birthdays with dinner at Piola, an Italian restaurant, where I had really good veal piccata and risotto.
We came back to my now-cooling house, opened gifts, visited and had a good time.
These are roses that friends brought me earlier in the week--you know how some roses just sort of droop their heads and that's it? These have opened magnificantly and are simply beautiful. I so enjoy having them on my desk. (I tried to figure how to move this picture up to the front of the blog but couldn't handle it.)

One of the nicest things about my lovely day was the fun of having a birthday when  you're on Facebook--I got all kinds of nice greetings from a wide variety of friends--kept me busy answering them until I finally gave up tonight and issued a blanket thank-you. I'm exhausted, but in a happy kind of tired way. And I still have a family birthday party to look foward to the last weekend of the month. Jamie and Mel and Lisa emailed, Megan and Brandon and their boys sang happy birthday over the phone, and it was just a wonderful day.

A worrisome day, a political rant, and a pleasant dinner

My oldest son, Colin, has Crohn's disease, and this morning Lisa, his lovely wife, took him to the ER because he was very sick last night. They scheduled a cat scan and admitted him, though it was six hours before he got a bed. He of course wanted to go right home, but they said no, he has a partial obstruction. Tonight I haven't heard the results of the scan--I imagine the radiologist won't read it until tomorrow--nor is there any word on the planned treatement. I'm worried, of course, as any mother would be. Offered to go to Houston if I couldl help Lisa with the children, but we're all in a wait mode. Colin has had mild flare-ups over the years and I'm sure he doesn't feel good a lot of the time but just doesn't tell us, but this is the first major problem he's had in eight years. Then, it took six months, changing doctors, and a lot of stuff before he had surgery. He had gotten down to 119 lbs. and looked like an Auschwitz survivor, but he's had a healthy weight since. I'm grateful that this time the doctors are on it right away, and his regular physician will see him. Still I'm waiting for word.
This morning a friend called to chat and in the conversation said she was ready to move to Arizona to support their anti-immigration law (I don't think she really is). When I admitted that the problem is really severe in Arizona but I wasn't sure this law was the right fix, she said, "Well, our government isn't doing anything and somebody has to start somewhere." Then on the Diane Rehm show I listened to Tea Party members who say the government should have no control over any aspect of our lives (I wonder if they realize what chaos would result if the government suddenly withdrew from everything--reminds me of the guy who said, "And keep your government hands off my Medicare." Duh?) Our neighborhood email newsletter has been abuzz (okay, pun, it's the Berkeley Buzz) with messages about the possibility of a historic overlay. Berkeley is one of those neighborhoods of charming older homes, many dating back to the  1920s, and yet we've had a few cases of people tearing down older homes and building McMansions that don't fit the neighborhood at all. On the Buzz, it's amazing how many people are adamant that the government can't tell them what to do with their homes (actually the overlay only affects the exterior and does not impinge on updating, etc.). But the conclusion I reached is the government is damned if it does and damned if it doesn't. People want the government so solve the BP spill, solve the immigration problem, create new jobs (magically, I presume), and solve all other problems--but don't let the government trample on my rights as an individual. I think people have to decide to have it one way or another. Okay, rant done.
I had a lovely evening tonight. Carol Roark and I celebrate July birthdays, and Kathie Lang Allen cooked dinner for us and included good friend and fellow publisher Fran Vick. Delicious chicken salad (a la Helen Corbitt), asparagus, tomato aspic, and, wonder of wonders, popovers! Plus a peach poundcake for dessert. We visited, traded gossip, and ate heartily. The gift exchange was lovely, and I am grateful to my friends for some lovely additions to my home.

Cooking My Way through the Day

Yesterday I thought I was so smart. I made my barbecue sauce, set the table for eight, and just before I went to bed put a chuck roast in the crockpot, covered it with barbecue sauce,and let it cook all night, thinking I would have very little to do in the morning. Hah! Dealing with the barbecue took a lot of time--you know how recipes say to let 4 cups cook down to one cup and indicate it will take ten minutes. Hogwash! Took the better part of an hour! And then I had to shred the meat, combine the rest of the barbecue sauce, pour part of it, carefully measured over the meat and put it all in the fridge. Then came the bean salad which reqauired lots of  chopping--tomatoes, onions, grated cheese, etc. And I forgot I planned to make cucumber salad, so I peeled and sliced the cucumbers and let them soak in salted water, made the sour cream dressing, and went, gratefully, to eat my lunch.  By that time I had spent almost two hours in the kitchen, and I figured I'd count that as moderate housework for WeightWatchers points--after all I was on my feet, and I was tired. Must mean something.
But dinner was a snap to put together at the last minute--put the meat in a low oven to warm, make the onion dip, open the potato chips, heat the barbecue sauce in the microwave, chop lettuce and avocado into the salad (Jordan and Elizabeth helped). We were celebrating Elizabeth's birthday, a milestone one at 40 and she was well aware of it and appreciative of where she is at that age, as well she deserves to be. We were also belatedly celebrating Jay's birthday (40 plus some) of a couple of weeks ago. The barbecue sandwiches were delicious, if I do say so, and Jordan made a wonderful Bundt cake. A jolly evening. Christian, bless him, had all the dinner dishes in the dishwasher by the time we cleared the table and put the cake on. And Jacob was absolutely charming all evening. Weldon brought him superheroes comic books and figures (Weldon's always been a comic book collector and source of knowledge and now his new job puts him right in that field). He may just be Jacob's best new friend.
Now I'm tired and glad tomorrow is a long day at home. And look at the good leftovers I have! One thing I don't like about aging is that I can't cook straight through a day--I have to take tiny breaks to rest my back. But I still spent a lot of time in the kitchen today, and that's a joy to me.
And, no, I didn't forget my recent resolve not to let Weight Watchers rule my life--I loved the whole meal and ate heartily.

Birthdays and Bookstores

Jordan, my youngest child, turned 35 today--fortunately, she's not yet at the point of being sensitive about her age, but I can hardly believe it. Sometimes I think we should celebrate her birthday in April, since she was 30 days old when we brought her home, a placid, happy baby. That night, friends gathered to see the new baby, and she slept through it all in the midst of the crowd. That sort of set the tone for her life--well, in a way.
Today we celebrated with what has been a tradition--the two of us going to lunch. We have gone for years to our "family" restaurant, Cafe Aspen, which has now closed. But David, the owner and our good friend, is now at Mira Vista Country Club and invited us to come out there for lunch, which we did. It's a lovely place, and we enjoyed lingering over lunch and a glass of wine, plus a good visit with David. I was a little intimidated--new spaces sometimes do that to me, and I felt a bit like I was barging in where I didn't belong, so I held close to Jordan while we walked across the parking lot.
After lunch we went to Bed, Bath and Beyond to look for the makeup mirror she wanted but didn't see what she wants, let alone at a reasonable price. I found one I thought might do but Jord thought $40 was too much and she would "research" online. It was amazing how much better I walked at Bed, Bath & Beyond--didn't need Jordan, didn't need my stick, etc.
It was a satisfying outing and a good visit with my baby-child. As the youngest, she has always been petted and spoiled and has sometimes earned her nickname of "the Princess." We'll have family birthday Sunday with the tacos she always wants but a a twist on them--I am tired to death of hamburger meat seasoned with that packet taco seasoning. I'm going to experiment.
A piece in the mail yesterday told me that a local independent bookstore, founded and now owned by friends of mine, is closing. I'm not surprised in this day and age and wonder how it held on so long--I suspect by school book sales. Connections has always been about more than selling books--it was about bringing people together, introducing them to new ideas, people, groups, activities, whatever. For a while I led a book group that met there. The store was new age when that was new, but as Peggy said to me today, "I'ts time. Times are changing." Since she never bought a computer, I guess she's right. Sad, though, to see another indie go under.The book trade is changing so fast, as is the business of publishing. Makes me glad I retired.

Family fun, pandemonium, and the long road home

Pandemonium reigned at the Hudgeons' household in Austin when about 55 adults and children gathered to celebrate Sawyer's fifth birthday. They were in and out of the pool, traipsing through the house to the potty (I was impressed that so many used the potty and didn't pee in the pool), and grabbing pizza and drinks. I confess I spent much of the time inside--Austin ws miserably hot like most of Texas--visiting some with Sawyer's other grandmother, some with friends who wandered by, and some with people I'd never met. At pizza time, most of the Alter clan--15 of us, missing only Christian--seemed to end up inside, which was fun. And then after everyone left, Sawyer shed his swimsuit and in the buff began to open presents. Then again it was pandemoniuim, and I commented to Jamie that our family sure was noisy when they get together. "Are you just now noticing?" he asked. By 9:45 I thought it was midnight and went upstairs to my lair in the trees (about which all the kids are curious), read e-mails, finished a mystery, and had another glass of wine. But the other grownups stayed up by the pool until almost 2 a.m.--and some showed it this morning.

There were quiet moments. Austin's mornings are cool and blessedly bug-free (mosquitoes soon come out in full force), and I sat on the porch by the pool with a book and coffee, watching my younger grandchildren play--they were exiled outside so they wouldn't wake sleeping adults. Sure, they squabbled, but for the most part they shared, laughed, and played well together. Eventually everyone but a couple of adults, including me, ended back in the pool, eating pizza for lunch while they swam. Melanie, bless her, had made a run to Starbucks and stopped for ham and bread, so I had a sandwich--pizza is not on my diet. I sat on the porch and thought how blessed I am with children and grandchildren. I seem to have a pretty good relationship with all of them, though some of the younger grandchildren that I see less often are a bit uncertain. Kegan, 2, from Houston, will come up and talk to me and give me things to hold but he won't sit on my lap, and his three-year-old sister turns shy when I ask for a kiss, though she gave me a nice going-away hug. I can't imagine how one woman can get so lucky to have four wonderful children, all of whom married wonderful people, and produced beautiful and sweet children. Me, prejudiced? Naw, it's all true.

Jordan, Jaob and I left about 1:15 for what proved to be the long road home. We had to pull off a couple of times, once in Temple because Jordan and Jacob needed hamburgers. When we pulled back on, traffic was suddenly bumper to bumper and stayed that way until we turned west at Hillsboro. And Jordan had to stop at West for sausage. The traffic would be bumper to bumper, 20 mph, and then for no reason pick up to 60 mph and move along nicely, then back to creeping. I told Jordan I felt like I was on Amtrak--slow down, start up, slow down, stop. It took us over 5 hours to get to my house--should be 3 hours on a good day. Fortunately Jordan and I travel well together (Jacob did well until the last hour of the trip when he was pretty much replaced by this whiny child I didn't recognize--though sometimes the Jacob I knew came back briefly). Jordan put my bags on the porch and headed home--no time for even bringing them inside. We were all exhausted, but it was a wonderful weekend.

And we'll do it all over again next weekend when they'll all be in Fort Worth, celebrating my retirement and birthday.

I went quite a bit over my Weight Watchers daily points this weekend (didn't use up all my weekly bous points though) needless to say but I noticed that I ate a lot differently than I would have before I started the program--this morning when others were having cereal, etc. I had a small thing of yogurt. Yesterday I had about 2 Tbsp. of eggs instead of a big helping. And surely my ham sandwich was less points that two pizzas. Saturday night I ate one piece of Margarita pizza which I figured I could count as thin-crust cheese and only about 1/4 of a small piece of cake. The proof will come tomorrow when I weigh.

Three days of work this week, and then I'm retired. I think I feel great about it but of course there's lingering doubt. And it may not hit me until next Tuesday when I wake up and the kids are all gone and I really have to plan the rest of my life. But I do have a lot of irons in the fire, and I'm hopeful. Plus closets and files and bookshelves that really are over-run and need sorting. And friends to have lunch with. It may be what they way is true, retirement can be the busiest time of your life.

An Easter/Birthday celebration

I'm just back from Houston, where all of us celebrated the second b'day of Kegan, the youngest among us, and the upcoming 40th b'day of Colin David, my oldest child--no, I cannot believe I have a child of 40. With eight adults (ten one night) and seven children, it was controlled chaos and wonderful fun. I'm not much of a photographer, but I tried--the picture on the top left is Colin (and behind him his father-in-law John), next most of the children gathered around one table for two kinds of cake--Kegan's chocolate and Colin's favorite yellow cake (always drove me wild when he was a child--I want chocolate!), then Maddie, the oldest child, doing some Karioke--she has a charming voice, and I wish now I'd asked her to sing "Michael Rowed the Boat Ashore" And finally my four grandsons, ranging in age from a couple of months shy of five to the two-year-old, three towheads and Jacob with his dark, curly hair--and inability to stay still for more than two minutes. The children all play well together and are delighted to see each other--as I watched them digging in the huge sandpile yesterday or hunting from eggs (hidden in plain view, of course) in the rain this morning, I thought what rich memories they are growing up with. Maddie, at almost nine, is by far the oldest and is the self-appointed caretaker of babies--she cuddles and loves when they cry, changes their diapers when needed, puts them on the potty, dresses them, and seems to enjoy it all. And she and three-year-old Morgan sleep all in a tangle on the pull-out bed in the living room. And then, a thoroughly modern child, she is off to her hand-held computer games.

Lisa, Colin's wife, knocked herself out cooking, and we ate royally--eggs and sausage Sat. morning, grilled hot dogs Sat. noon, and Doris casserole (which I've mentioned here before) Sat. night--Colin's request. We also had Colin's queso: a note about that below. And this morning, sausage and Rotel quiches and that wonderful potato casserole made from frozen hash browns--everything in it you should not eat but oh! so good.

I had been a bit apprehensive about the trip--now I view that as babying myself, but I was so tired much of last week that I was afraid of getting tired. I went to bed early both nights, slept long, and got a two-hour nap Sat. Colin said he felt bad about putting his 70-year-old mom on an air mattress but there wasn't much choice. I had confined quarters in his already overcrowded study, and it was fine except that my hips discovered they really don't like air mattresses. For much of yesterday, one hip didn't seem to want to work right. But I still slept pretty well and am not nearly as exhausted tonight as I expected.

I noticed an interesting thing. Maybe because of my just-past pneumonia, but my kids are--well, careful of me. The boys, Colin and Jamie, are always there to see if I need an arm to lean on and almost always I say, "Thanks. I'm fine." And in passing each child gives me a pat on the shoulder, a quick rub on the back, some much appreciated gesture of affection, and I try to return them. I was always being urged to sit and rest, until I felt useless, and I was always given the stable good patio chair and not one of the collapsible ones--even if it meant moving a semi-protesting grandchild. I love the attention and the affection it reflects but I don't want them to start thinking of me as old--or letting me think that way. And that's why much of the time I say thanks but no thanks to the kind offer of an arm. Of course it was a bit much as we left today when I said I had to go back and get the muffins and water I'd left--Colin volunteered and came back waving the muffins and a bottle of white wine. "Is this what you wanted?"

A word about Colin's queso: a friend gave me this years ago (she has now forgotten it) but it is the best queso ever, heavy and hearty enough that I used to serve it to the kids for supper when they were in high school:

Brown 1 lb. hamb. and 1 lb. ground sausage, breaking up clumps as you go (your choice to use hot, mild, or regular sausage)

Put in crock pot with

1 lb. Velveeta

1 medium jar Pace Picante (again, your choice--choose hot, medium or mild)

1 can cream of mushroom soup

When melted and ingredients are blended, serve with corn chips. Enjoy!

Another lazy day--and a charming evening

Tonight my neighbor Sue and I went to Bass Hall (Fort Worth's big impressive musical hall) to hear Alan Alda. We even got to go to the VIP reception beforehand, where Sue bought a book and told Alda it was for her ex-husband. He laughed aloud and said Fort Worth was a very broad-minded town. The food at the reception was good, and it was fun to feel like we were VIPs, though I knew few people there, which tells me I'm not a real VIP. These programs usually consist of the former book editor of the paper interviewing the guest for about an hour, but Alda did a stand-alone monolog for 30 minutes. He was a great storyteller, charming, funny, self-deprecating, absolutely captivating. I finally had to excuse myself because my cell phone kept going off--I thought it was off but no such luck--and when I came back the books editor was interviewing him, which got a bit more serious but still interesting. And then the audience q&a which had really funny moments. Alda had said he didn't think about his legacy or how people would remember him--"When I'm gone, I'm gone"--so when one woman asked who he wanted to deliver his eulogy, he looked at her and said, "Are you available?" It was truly a captivating evening, and we were both glad we'd gone.
Earlier in the day Mary Lu came over with bags of books, and I pulled out the bags I was ready to discard. We sorted into what belonged to who, who hadn't read what, and, thank goodness, the bigget pile was sell at Jordan's upcoming garage sale. Still I have a huge stack of unread books that beckon to me. Then I took Mary Lu for brunch at a local bistro to celebrate her birthday. It was all fun--we talked politics a lot, although we're in accord about that, and as always we talked about aches and pains and aging. I hate it that so many of my conversations with friends turn to those topics.
The rest of the day was lazy--lingering over the paper, reading a novel, napping, trying to figure out how to buy a small screen HDTV which I have decided is impossible. Now I'm going back to that novel tht doesn't absolutely enthrall me but is to good to put down.

A cool birthday

Today is Christian's birthday, and maybe the weather turned cool to honor him. When I left home to go to his birthday dinner, about 5:30, it was 89--what a blessing. And when I drove home tonight, I put the top down and sailed along in the twilight--somehow I love coming home from their house at dusk (I always want to be home by dark) with the top down. I can go back ways through tall tress and alongside creeks and parks, past some lovely homes. Jordan and Christian and two other couples are going to the Gulf Coast tomorrow for a few days. The trip, she says, is all about Jacob's first beach trip. I hope they love it.
I got some more things off my "recalled" list today. Earlier I took my hearing aids to the audiologist--they hadn't really been recalled, but he sent them off for a factory check-up, saying cheerily to me, "You won't miss them. You never wear them anyway." Today I took the car in to have the air bag sensor replaced and also confirmed an appointment for a consultation with the colonoscopy doctor. I'm slowly working my way down the list, though, of course, the biggie is what I am referring to as an "informational interiew" with the shoulder surgeon.
I'm on hold with the mystery again, telling myself I'm waiting to hear from the editor, which is, of course, fooling myself. I need to proceed, no matter what he says. Other things--bits and pieces--have kept me busy at my desk, but this should be a long weekend--Jordan and Christian gone, my neighbors on both sides, gone--I should get lots of work done.
I am editing a novel for the office that has completely charmed me, and I love working on it. So I'm not exactly idle. I am a much happier person when I am busy. As Jordan once tried to explain to Christian, "Mom doesn't hang out well." Tonight I got to their house at 6, and we "hung out" until 8, by which time I bolted my dinner down and rushed to get home before dark--but that was only part of the reason I rush. Jordan understands and loves me anyway, so it's okay.
For Christian's birthday, I gave him an IOU to a new wine cafe in town. Betty and I ate there last night and thoroughly enjoyed it, though much of the wine is pricey and the menu is limited--lots of designer pizza. Still, as Sue said to me, "It's a place where grownups go" as opposed to the singles bars frequented by the thirties crowd.
Got to go change some dinner reservations--my schedule next week is getting all mixed up.

Family, Friends, and Birthdays

How to say it? Last night was my birthday, and it was a wonderful, wonderful evening. My kids had planned, worked, and schemed to put together a perfect party. Eighty of my nearest and dearest gathered at La Puertita (a former church building with arched ceiling, a nave, and rich atmosphere that is part of the Joe T. Garcia's restaurant complex). Some were people I see frequently; a few, people I haven't seen in a long time. We mingled and visited, the children played--I told people all the children in the room were my grandchildren, until I realized my niece and nephew each had a baby there and my neighbor's children were also there. What struck me most was the party atmosphere--everyone was laughing and having a good time. We went through a buffet line for good Mexican food, and then Colin and Jamie briefly thanked everyone for coming and said, "Thank you for loving our mother as much as we do." Be still, my heart. There were no speeches, northing formal. They had set out a picture album, a guest book, and a computer slide show that rotated throughout the evening. Okay, there were a couple of pictures of me with frizzy hair and a wine jug or some other unattractive attribute but mostly I looked at them and thought what a rich and wonderful life I've led--and while I was never a show-stopper, I didn't look too bad in my prime, though a couple of kind people said I look better than ever now. The group picture above is all of us at our happiest and silliest (darn! I didn't realize how tiny and dark it would come out, and I don't know how to change the size once I've posted it); the other is me with my very protective big brother.

If I was proud of my children, I was grateful for the many many friends who cared enough to come out on a Sunday night, in the heat, to celebrate with me. One couple postponed a vacation trip a day or two to be there, and many others alluded to the times we've had together over the years. It was wonderful to be surrounded by the people that I most value. Of course, I missed the out-of-towners who couldn't come and those who had previous travel plans that kept them away. But I am most blessed with good friends. Yeah, it's been a rich seventy years and looking to get better.

Today I took the day off to reclaim my house and my senses, if I have any left after the high excitement of the weekend. I've had several phone calls about what wonderful children I have and beautiful grandchildren--I couldn't agree more. I've done loads and loads of sheets and towels, and picked up this odd thing and that and returned them to where they should be. Jordan took the day off too, and we had a birthday lunch at our favorite bistro. And then I took a two-hour nap, one of those where I could have kept drifting off if I hadn't been horrified when I looked at the clock.

Tomorrow is my "real" birthday, and I'm going back to work. I was tempted to take the day off, but there's too much waiting to be done. But I will have a b'day lunch with my office group and a b'day dinner with Jeannie and Betty at which we celebrate all three of our June/July birthdays.

And tomorrow I'll also get back to the real world routine, working, exercising, writing--and this blog will get back to being somewhat about writing. I've turned it this weekend into a very personal blog, and I thank you for bearing with me.

Camp Juju

The kids have labeled my remodeled guest apartment Camp Juju, and it's a hit. Last night an overtired Morgan fell down, was instantly pitiful. When asked if she wanted to go home, she said through her tears, "No, I want to go to Camp Juju."

The fun goes on. As you can above, cookie decorating is serious business--Jordan had sprinkles from wall to wall in her kitchen. Running under the hose and sitting in the back yard are serious too. And the picture of me? That's the oldest and youngest of our crew.

We're still having scheduling conflicts this morning. The crew at Jordan's house ate at nine, plan to ride the zoo train at 11. At ten the contingent at my house is waiting for the youngest, a morning napper, to wake up so we can go to breakfast. It is, as Jamie once said, like being in two different cities, and it's the reason I redid the apartment so it will sleep eight. But the babies are still too young. In a couple of years, the schedules should smooth out--but I bet there'll be another baby!

Tonight is the party, and I'm not sure what the kids have afoot. I do know it involves old family pictures, probably showing me at my worst, and this morning when I said I was going to have a bit of cottage cheese (one of my staples) Jamie whirled around and asked, "Did you say cottage cheese?" Then he rushed away as though on an important errand. I admit to much excitement but a little nervousness about the whole affair.

Company Weekend

All my kids will be home this weekend. They'll celebrate my 70th with a party Sunday night at a local Mexican favorite--Joe T.'s. They've rented a separate small building the restaurant owns and have invited lots of my nearest and dearest. I'm excited about it, so excited that I've decided I'm wound tight and that accounts for my recent lack of balance, a fear I'm now letting go of. And tonight, the first of the family arrived--Colin and Lisa, Morgan and Kegan. Morgan is just old enough to remember that she's been here, likes it, knows me, etc. For Kegan, I'm unexplored territory, though we snuggled on my bed while he had his bottle and he gave me lots of smiles and a kiss when he went to bed. Both kids thought my playroom was a delight--toys that while many times recycled were new to them. I hadn't expected the kids so early, so I rushed and defrosted bison ribeyes (medium report--gristly but flavorful, not as juicy as a beef steak). And I meant to make two King Ranch casseroles tonight, then decided I'd just cube the chicken, and got none of it down. My new resolve is not to worry about things like that. Lisa will help me, and we'll get it done tomorrow. I'm certainly not going to start cutting up three chickens at ten o'clock at night!
I was thinking about frugality today. With the state of the economy, rising gas prices and grocery bills (would you believe I spent $170 today?), everyone is feeling frugal--except me. For the first time in my life, I'm indulging in the little things--the slightly better wine, the bigger package of something, the shoes I really want even if I don't need them. And if it's for my grandkids? Well, why not two packages of ice cream cups instead of one? I bought makings for smoothies and makings for a trail mix type of snack, and I bought some new little toys for the playroom--self-inking washable stamps, crazy colors, and so on. It's a wonderful feeling to think that if I want something I can buy it--within limits of course but without the frugality that has governed my whole life. Oh, sure, I've wasted a lot of money along the way--bad purchases, bad investments, but don't we all? And no use crying over that. I think my motto today, in view of my non-frugality and my kid-filled weekend, is "Carpe diem!"
Tomorrow, pictures of the babies.

Telephones, Moving your Cheese, and Feeling Frail

Colin called tonight. He and his famly are in San Antonio, enjoying Sea World--Morgan said she'd seen Shamu and he'd splashed her--and the zoo, the river, and so forth. But he wanted me to call their hotel room. Morgan, almost three, has never seen anything other than a cell phone, and she didn't know what the phone on the beside table was. So I called, and she was excited. They'll be here tomorrow night, and I'm excited about that.

I won something today! At the monthly TCU Pinkbag Luncheon, which is always about books, I won a copy of Who Moved My Cheese? It's so brief that I read it quickly tonight. Basically, it's about change and adapting to change and letting go of old ways and fears--when I went to the podium to get it I said it was appropriate because I was facing a landmark b'day that meant change. But when I read it tonight, it spoke more to me about my fears and my balance, both of which have been too prominent in my consciousness lately.

I decided today that it's easy to feel that you're frail, and because of my sore foot, I let myself feel frail. As a result, I truly lost my balance a couple of times today, and once called out in panic to Melinda who was behind me. She said, "I've got you" and put a reassuring hand on my elbow. But I can't expect Melinda to always be there, and I have to abandon my old ways of thinking and look for the new cheese, without ranting about whoever moved it and it isn't fair. I also have to realize I have a sore foot, but I'm not frail by any means!

The days are going to get busy. Colin and family arrive tomorrow night--first guests in my new garage apartment. Then everyone else arrives Friday night, and I'll have dinner for everyone, so I'm making a double batch of King Ranch chicken tomorrow--supposed to feed 25. Knowing my gang it won't go that far. Saturday we'll be at Jordan's for dinner, after some mandatory shopping for a birthday outfit for me (Megan's mandatory, not mine) and Sunday night is my b'day party at Joe T.'s. There'll be quite a crowd, all people I love a lot, and I'm excited about it, though a bit self-conscious. Everyone will leave Monday, but Jordan and I have both taken the day off--we'll "do" a fancy lunch and sort of let the day roll over us. Tuesday, my true b'day, I suspect it will be back to work, but my co-workers are taking me to lunch. So I'm happily anticipating the next few days and vowing not to let myself get stressed, tired, any of those bad things. I'm going to enjoy my grandchildren.

I may not post often the next few days, but I should have pictures whenever I do.

A pratfall followed by good things

Quote of the day: Author Jonathan Coe, when asked by reporter from The Guardian if there was a secret to writing, answered "Yes." (Stolen from "Shelf Awareness," an internet newsletter for booksellers.)


My spell of bad incidents apparently isn't over. Last night when I went out to feed the dog and clean up his yard, I fell, as the Brits would say, ass over teakettle. I'm not sure what caught my foot, but this was definitely not anything to do with my poor sense of balance. I tripped, pooper scooper in one hand, and went down, fortunately missing concrete steps and some pipes but landing on top of Scooby (at least two people have asked about the dog before asking about my well-being!). I was stunned, as was Scooby, who started to panic, but I talked to him, asked him for a minute to gather myself and see if I could get up--and he, blessed dog, lay very still. Then I got up, without holding on to anything BECAUSE I wasn't thinking about it. (Usually I need to hold on to something to get up from the floor, etc.) No serious damage, though the purple bruise on my shoulder looks horrendous. It doesn't hurt. I have a scrape on one finger, and my middle right finger today is swollen and sore. I'm definitely going to live. Jordan was furious because I didn't have my cell phone--it would have flown out of my hands anyway, if I did have it!


Today my horoscope said that I could come across old friends but would find them dull and boring and should remember that they can be trusted. I was lunching with Jean and Jeannie, so I sent them warning emails. Jeannie can dancing down her driveway, looking like a 60-something sprite, got in the car, and asked if that was lively enough. Teased me all during a great lunch at the ArtCafe in the Community Arts Center, where I was able to arrange for two exhibitions of photographs for forthcoming books. Then I went to dinner with Betty, who was under the same responsibility of being lively--she carried it to extremes by getting lost in southwest Fort Worth. I mean, how many years have both of us lived here?

Friday
I started this yesterday and now I forget why I didn't post it, except that I must have expected to have more to say. Not a lot, unfortunately. As I write, Jacob is asleep in the guest room. We think he's getting two year molars, because he has unexplained fever and occasional bouts of misery--he had several of those tonight, but if I hugged him and loved on him, he got quickly over them.
I bought two mysteries in a series I'd heard mentioned several times on one of the Sisters in Crime lists. Lesson learned: never buy more than one book by an author you haven't read. This is the second--and I hope final--time I've learned that lesson. The idea behind the series is great--note I'm not mentioning series, author or titles--but the writing is wooden, full of cliches and awkward comparisons. Where writing should dance off the page, this lies there in a sodden mess. I kept trying but finally tonight, while keeping Jacob and Shreck company, gave up. Will he ever tire of Schreck? I doubt it.
Meantime, my mystery is going well. I've felt good about the rewrites I've done but haven't moved forward. I hope to do that this weekend. The only thing on my schedule tomorrow, after Jacob's parents come for him, is a grocery trip, so I hope to get a lot of work done. And some cooking--I found a good snack mix I'm going to make for when the grandchildren are here next week--Shredded Wheat, popcorn, nuts and pretzels, seaoned and baked. I'm also going to make fresh pesto because I need to cut my basil back and a roast chicken for a guest Monday night. Should be fun.
I'm really getting excited about my birthday party and a long weekend with all my kids and grandkids. Colin and his famly arrive Thursday night, everyone else will trail in on Friday, so we'll all be here for supper Friday--two big casseroles!. Megan insists I have to have a new outfit, so Saturday is a shopping day, with dinner at Jordan's, and Sunday is my b'day dinner. Jordan and I are both taking Monday off, because most of the kids will be leaving Monday morning. I am so excited, that it's worth turning seventy.

Austin--and grandsons

I'm in Austin, in a house with four adults, an almost-four-year-old, a 22 mos.and an 18 mos. Our days are pandemonium--screaming, yelling, squealing, giggling, tears--and the blessed quiet of nap time (quiet time for the oldest one and naptime for the grandmother). The boys play wonderfully well together, aside from pushing, shoving, grabbing,etc. Sawyer, the oldest, seems to delight in pushing Jacob in the swing, and Ford, the youngest, plays quietly and then suddenly belts out "Jacob!" At 6 p.m. they are fussy and hungry; by 7:30 they're hyperactive, fatigue coming out in silliness and screams; by 8 all is quiet and they're in their beds. It's a joy to see them together. And for me, it's a particular joy to get to know Sawyer and Ford better--and have them know me. At first Sawyer hung back,saying he wasn't ready to give me a hug, and Ford stared at Jordan and me curiously as though wondering who these interlopers were that were sitting in his front yard. (The fenced front yard is their playground with more than enough toys.) But then he looked at me and said, "Gaga." (That's the Austin boys name for me, while everyone else calls me Juju.) Then he looked at Jordan and said "Jojo." The ice was broken, and we were off to high good times. We don't get this kind of togetherness when the whole family is together,and while I miss the others, I value this.
In between I sneak up to the office,where I'm sleeping, to deal with emails and read on my Kindle. Megan scolded me for reading when I don't see my grandsons that often. So I'm trying to limit it.
Last night after we'd gone out for Mexican food at a riverfront restaurant, Jordan announced that after the boys were in bed, the parents were going to have an intervention with me. My first thought, of course, was "Hey, I like my white wine but I don't drink that much!" I asked if I had to move out of my house,quit my job, quit drinking. She said no, it was something good. But then when we got to it she began with, "We all love you a whole lot, but you can be controlling." I heard those as damning words, because I try so hard not to be controlling. It turns out though that ever since I turned my b'day celebration over to the kids--at their request--I've been bugging her about this person and that who knows it's my 70th b'day and wants to be included. She told her siblings I was driving her wild, and they decided to tell me so I could enjoy anticipation and she could have a littlel peace and quiet. They were in part feeling sorry that I missed Scotland and wanted to give me something to look forward to. So here I am, sort of controlling my b'day party and very excited about it.
But determined not to feel my age. When I woke up Sunday after my busy day with Maddie I was stiff and sore, I hurt and I was tired. Depression snuck in because I thought maybe I really was getting old. But the next day I was fine--and at the end of the drive to Austin I was less stiff than Jordan.Since I've been here I've done better on balance--even on uneven flagstone--and I've been free of aches and pains (well, mostly) in spite of sleeping on a mattress on the floor. I'm back to thinking it's in large part attitude.
Big on my mind: I need a writing project, and I want to find a way to market my mystery. But I'll think about that tomorrow.

Random thoughts on birthdays and mysteries

I've been trying to read a Tami Hoag mystery. I read one before and thought I liked it, but I'm about to give up on this one--something I never do with books. I just don't like the people. It's the racehorse crowd in Florida, and they're smarmy. And the heroine is so ful of angst I tire of reading her inner thoughts--talk about self-hate! I may flip through to make sure the missing girl, apparently kidnapped, is found alive, but then I'm done. Okay, I already did flip to the end, and the heroine has suddenly softened and decided she and the world are both worthwhile. I don't think I have the patience to make that journey with her. When my neighbor came over the other night and noticed the book, he said something that made me think he reads Tami Hoag. So I'm giving it to him. My time will be better spent reading Louisa May Alcott for the online class--I'd forgotten how wry Alcott can be. Meantime I'm about to undertake a new line of research--not really talking about it yet, but it has to do with Scottish settlement in Texas, and Ill see where, if anywhere, it takes me.
All day today I kept thinking it was my birthday, which it's not. But I had plans to go to dinner with Betty and Jeannie to celebrates our mutual birthdays, so I felt special. And then I came home and found a b'day card apparently dropped in the mailbox by a friend who was on her way out of town. So I think I've begun celebrating over a week early. We had a lovely evening tonight--wine, cheese, and presents at my house, followed by dinner at a new restaurant that's been serving lunch for a couple of months but only opened for dinner tonight. Nice menu, good food, good service--just fun to explore.
This morning was one of those mornings when I couldn't decide what to wear. Finally ended up in a turquoise outfit that taught me a lesson when I bought it--much as I love Coldwater Creek clothes, I can't buy pants without trying them on. These are--surprise!--way too big and baggy. I topped the outfit with a sheer, brightly flowered, ruffle blouse and added a turquoise necklace. All day long, people said what pretty colors I was wearing and some even said how pretty I looked--but you know what, no one said, "Your pants are too big!" Lesson learned.

Rainy holidays

Jokes about Noah's Ark are no longer funny. We've had so much rain in the last few days that roads are awash, puddles stand in the schoolyard across the street, and the dog path, beaten by Scooby in my back yard, is a trough of mud. The Frisco Alters spent the night last night and brought their chocolate lab, Mozby, so there were two dogs--which meant that neither was in the dog house, both ran back and forth in the mud, and they were the dirtiest things I've ever seen. Jamie took Mozby around to the front porch, bathed and dried him, and he was fine. After they left, I thought I'd just bring Scoob in, towel him off, and make up to him for hurt feelings because Mozby had been in and he hadn't. Not so easy--he was the muddiest thing I've ever seen, and there seemed no sense in bathing him since he had to go outside again. I left him inside a while, had a heck of a time getting him out, and then had to mop floors, wash dog rugs, etc.--which involved figuring out why the wet Swiffer didn't work. But I did it. Now I have to think about getting him in for the night. The rain is supposed to stop tomorrow and then maybe I'll think about bathing him.
Megan and family were supposed to come for the weekend too but didn't make it--and this morning I was glad, because I heard on TV that the highway between here and Austin was undere water in places.
We gathered for Jacob's first birthday party Saturday--about 40 people and 15 kids, lots of scrumptious food, and a good time. Jacob loved being the center of attention, dug into his cake with both hands, was pretty much uninterested in presents (of which he got many!). His parents reported this morning that he woke screaming about ten last night--after the fact I diagnosed tummy ache. Too much cake and not enough dinner, except the pieces of chicken Maddie fed him.
I slept soundly last night. When I had teenagers at home, I loved those nights when they were all in their beds--I slept well with an easy mind. I guess it carries on, because even having one and his family in the house, I slept with a great sense of security. The rain helped. When Maddie finally got up she reminded me that I'd promised to buy her a Nancy Drew book, so off we went to the bookstore. She chose The Hidden Staircase, which I remember. To my delight she's a reader, going through as much as a book as day, as I did at her age. Edie chose three Dora books, because if you bought two you got the third one free!
Our festive Fathers' Day dinner lacked a little because two branches of the family were missing, but we had a good time. I fixed a turkey roulade, filled with green chiles, cumin, garlic, and feta, along with green chili rice and the marinated vegetables that the girls love. Maddie made the rice casserole but was hesitant about eating it because she doesn't like chiles. I told her she had to eat it since she made it, and she said "Okay, but I'm not eating the green things."
As always, at the end of the weekend, I'm so grateful for family. Oh, heck, I'm gratefull too for the rain, but what will I do about that muddy dog? Meantime, I've got to get back to work.