Haunting Hunter

 

Do you mind another rant tonight? I’m angry. Today the Washington Post had an article that in effect said Biden’s compassion for his son “blew up in his face.” I think just the opposite: the Republicans vicious, vengeful investigation of Hunter Biden has made them look ridiculous.

That’s not to say the younger Biden hasn’t done some pretty awful things in the past—no need to detail them here because MTG already did a good and appalling job of that. Although he flaunted father’s power and reputation, there has been no proof found that he ever compromised the president, whether that is due to the son’s caution or the father’s wisdom, we may never know.

I know liberals who say they have no sympathy for Hunter because he was raised with wealth and privilege and still “went bad.” That seems to imply wealth and privilege will protect you from a bad drug habit, though I think just the opposite is often true. There is a judgmental Puritanical thought in that thread about strength and courage will always lead you to make good choices. I’m not sure that’s true either. I like to remember that Jesus pardoned the sinner, especially the repentant sinner.

But let’s go back to wealth and privilege. Hunter was born in 1970, the year his father was elected to the Senate. I don’t think there was a lot of wealth then. When Hunter was two, he and his older brother, the late Beau Biden, were seriously injured in a tragic accident that took the lives of their mother and younger sister. The boys were hospitalized for some time. Who can calculate the damage done to a two-year-old by such trauma? After that, theirs was probably not a normal childhood—their father was in the Senate and they no doubt had nannies, though it is to Joe Biden’s credit that he rarely stayed in DC but went home to Delaware each night to be with his boys.

I have not researched Hunter’s life enough to know when and why he turned to alcohol and drugs but apparently those problems increased after the 2015 death of his brother, Beau. Today, though, Hunter seems to be trying to put his life back together again. He has paid his back income taxes. (Tax experts tell us that people almost never go to prison over delinquent taxes these days, so no, James Comer and  Gym Jordan, he did not get a sweetheart deal—he was treated like any other citizen.) That his plea bargain on the gun charge has to be negotiated does not appear to be politically motivated. He has acknowledged his out-of-wedlock child and is apparently trying to be a good father to all his children. And he has the firm support of his father and stepmother.

What Republicans Chuck Grassley (that old man who ought to retire and who has said he doesn’t care if the accusations are true or not), James Comer (new to the national spotlight and so anxious for his five minutes of fame) and Gym Jordan (always a pain, but karma may get him yet—lots of athletes remember Ohio) have done is to target Joe Biden at his weakest point. Hunter’s former business partner, Devon Archer, pretty much laid their hopes to rest this week, but they blunder on with accusations. It is a shameful spectacle.

Throughout all this, Joe Biden has remained in the background, at least on this specific issue. As a parent, I can only imagine the urge to retaliate, to deny, to speak out in anger must be strong. But as Biden has done with other attacks on his age, his integrity, his ability, he has kept his head down and gone about the business of governing the United States. I think such rectitude indicates great strength of character, and I admire him.

And, personally, I am rooting for Hunter. I hope he stays on the straight and narrow, finds his calling, and goes on to a successful life. Gulp, he’s a year younger than my oldest son and the same age as my oldest daughter. and I know how I feel about them. I could never be as restrained as Biden.

Ageism, politics, and a lot of misconceptions

 

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about aging—and I’ve been discussing—arguing?—with two people near and dear to me—my wonderful son-in-law and my Canadian daughter. It all began over wine one night when Sue described President Biden as “ancient” and said he’ll be eighty at the end of his term. I heard an implied judgment that he is too old to be useful, although Christian says I am too quick to get my feelings hurt. I don’t think it was so much that I was offended for myself as it was that I was angry that Biden would be discounted because of his age.

Sue later explained in emails that yes, he has done some great things and will have a strong legacy. But she is talking about electability. Christian reinforced that later by saying people of a certain age—he chose over eighty—generally have problems and aren’t as sharp. At eighty-four, I really did take that personally, and he hastened to add, “not everybody.” But that, to me, is the problem.

America suffers from ageism, the habit of judging people by their age. It involves a prejudice against certain groups because of age. I of course see it primarily as a prejudice against the elderly, some of whom are much sharper mentally than many people in middle age. But the truth is that ageism is a factor at any point in life. Ageism does generally refer to the elderly; reverse ageism refers to the young.

I have six teenage grandchildren (one of the original seven aged out and is now in her early twenties). They are as different as can be, but each is a good kid, pursuing his or her own goals, leading a good life. To try to generalize them as teenagers would be to miss so much about each of them. Yet I am aware of the stereotypes of teenagers—lazy, irresponsible, not planning ahead, not reliable. It’s simply not true if you look at individuals and not the group.

Many of us strive daily to counter racial and gender stereotypes, yet we accept the prevailing wisdom that people over eighty are pretty much without value. When I pointed out all that President Biden has accomplished a great deal on behalf of the average American, Sue countered with, “Yes, but I see him in daily gaffes.” So today I saw a clip of a gaff: In a speech, Biden said he son Beau died in Iraq, although he fairly quickly corrected himself. Beau Biden died in Maryland, I believe, of a glioblastoma, probably traceable to exposure during his service in Iraq. The misconnection was easily made because Biden associates the death with Iraq, as do I. The thing is Joe Biden is noted far and wide for gaffes—he’s been making them all his long political career. They aren’t the sign of a failing mind or increasing dementia—they are what happens when a lifelong stutterer must weigh every word he utters and think carefully about it. Political opponents, however, have been quick to jump on his gaffes as signs of dementia or senility, and I hear it repeated, parrot-like, on social media.

Part of the problem with Biden is style. He’s a keep-your-head-down, plow-ahead, do-your-job kind of person. His humor is dry and understated, and he’s not at all pretentious. Americans have become accustomed to political bombast, politicians who yell and accuse and point fingers, tell outrageous lies, use fear to control people. It’s like poor Paul Pelosi being hit in the head with a hammer every day. And there is no humor or wit. But I’m afraid Sue is right. Americans won’t see this. In 2024, they’ll see an old man who should be put out to pasture.

I’m no stranger to stereotyping. I’ve needed a walker now for five years, going on six. In addition, I don’t hear well. I’ve found two distinct reactions: some people are so courteous and helpful that it reassures me that the world is still full of good people. Other people ignore me. Because I don’t drive, I usually have someone with me, and too often the salesclerk, the receptionist in a doctor’s office, the official in the DMV where I got my official non-driving i.d. talks to whoever is with me, ignoring me even though we are there because of my business. I want to wave my hand and say, “Woohoo! There’s still a pretty good, functioning brain in here.”

Americans need to get over stereotyping and profiling of all kinds. For me and my generation, ageism is especially offensive. I’m afraid a sea change in attitude may not come in time for Joe Biden and the 2024 elections or perhaps even in my lifetime. But I’m going to continue to do everything I can to fight the stereotype. And Joe Biden? Don’t count him out yet.

Just for grins, read this: 80 Over 80: ranking the most influential 80-plus-year-olds in America. (slate.com)

The Cowtown Marathon, the dreaded pandemic, and politics

Jordan and Marge cheering for runners

especially Marge's husband Colman

If I did the math right in my head, the forty-second Cowtown Marathon was run today, a beautiful, sunny clear day—with a high temperature of 77 predicted. Way too hot for runners, though most seasoned marathoners probably finished before the temperature hit seventy.

I well remember sitting in our office area at home late the night before the first marathon. My then-husband suddenly came out with, “*&%$! Sleet! I don’t want to hear sleet.” He was one among several men instrumental in planning and putting together the early marathons in this city. To his dismay, the next day revealed ice-covered, sleet-slick streets—hazardous for runners. With a courage I lack today, I packed four young children into a big old Cadillac sedan and headed cautiously for the race, although I don’t remember much about the rest of the day. Just that scary drive.

The late February date makes weather always unpredictable, and I don’t know which is worse—heat or precipitation. I am guessing that in 1978 there were already so many marathons scheduled across the country, that Cowtown planners took whatever open date they could—and crossed their fingers.

On another front, primary elections now share the spotlight with the corona virus 19 or COVID19. The government is cracking down on information and distorting statistics, but wise, sensible advice is out there if you can find it. I read an article today by a Dr. James Robb, with practical suggestions for protecting  yourself and your family, from frequent handwashing to latex gloves for the grocery store. According to Dr. Robb, the virus is lung specific—it only attacks the lungs and is carried in the air and on objects by droplets from sneezes and coughs. The virus can stay active on a surface for up to ten days—so that means protection when you pump gas, push an elevator button, grasp a railing. Read his suggestions here: https://www.lotterypost.com/blogentry/151944 Instead of blocking information and downplaying the threat, the government would do well to go on a massive education campaign.

A bit of irony: the governor of the state of Washington has declared an emergency because of the virus, while the national government in Washington, D.C. says the threat to most Americans is minimal. Dr. Robb would support the Washington governor.

Just my opinion: I’m pretty happy about the results of the South Carolina Democratic primary. Several people claim it is now a race between Biden and Sanders and the rest should drop out. Maybe it’s just my personal wish, but I want Elizabeth Warren to hang in there, though I’ll be really happy with Joe Biden as the next president of the United States.

I do get frustrated with campaigns that play the panic button as part of their fundraising efforts. The campaigns (though not necessarily the candidates) of Mark Kelly in Arizona and Jaimie Harrison in South Carolina are the worst about it. This morning, I saw advice to pack it up and go home because Harrison is losing; five minutes later another post crowed that he’s surging.

Reacting to election news is like reacting to the corona virus news—take it all with a grain of  salt and look for the sensible middle ground.

Colman giving his fans the high sign

The problem of hugging

A quiet weekend here in the hinterlands of North Texas. Visits with favorite people, including a friend who lives thirty miles away and might as well live 300—always so glad when we get together. And my favorite newlyweds came for wine—Teddy is such a gentleman, always tells me I look younger and prettier every time he sees me. I know it’s not true, but it makes me feel good.  And Teddy gives great hugs.

I’m puzzled these days by the problem of hugging. Psychologists tell us we need something like eight hugs a day for optimum mental health. That might lead you to hug everyone you meet during the day but wait! At the other extreme is the current occupant of the White House who apparently does not hug—he attacks, hands under the skirt and the full-on assault. And in the middle is apparently Joe Biden who is, by nature, an affectionate man and a hugger but not lascivious.

As the whole world now knows, Lucy Flores, a former Nevada legislator, has come forward to say that “Uncle Joe” kissed her inappropriately five years ago. I don’t know anything else about Lucy Flores, but I do know she has just scuttled the presidential ambitions of the Democrat with the highest poll numbers. Because he made her feel weird.

Yes, Biden needs to watch his physical interaction with women, especially now that it’s become a national distraction from the real issues that beset us. But I think Ms. Flores needs to do a bit of self-examination. Maybe she wasn’t hugged enough as a child and consequently doesn’t know how to receive physical affection? Or worse yet, maybe she was abused and see every physical touch as a threat. But the bigger question to me is why now?

If Biden’s actions truly offended her, she should and could have dealt with it tactfully at the time. As a gubernatorial candidate (or was it lt. gov.?) she surely was a politician with enough self-confidence to turn the situation any way she wanted to. But no, she says now it was creepy. Five years later, when she’s had all that time for memory to distort, she comes forward at a critical moment in his career. As I always feared, the ”Me Too” movement has gone too far.

It’s sad that as a country we cannot distinguish affectionate from lascivious, and we castigate the former and make a hero of the latter. I’ve even heard too many stories of elementary school teachers who are afraid to give a student a comforting hug for fear of being misunderstood. Ah, old Aristotle gets it right all the time—moderation in all things.

I’m not promoting Joe Biden for the Democratic nomination. I haven’t chosen a candidate yet and don’t intend to for some time, because I think it’s important to choose the woman or man who can defeat the Republicans. But I do think Biden is a seasoned statesman with much experience, a reasonable and sensible man, and maybe our greatest hope. It isn’t even about the fact that he’s gotten a raw deal. My indignation is about the fact that voters have been robbed of the chance to make a decision on a level playing field.

Hugging is in part a matter of instinct, and maybe that’s where Biden went wrong. I have friends, both male and female, who are huggers and friends who are not. It’s a difference I think I can sense, but I value both kinds. And I’d welcome a hug from Joe Biden any day.

Pomp, circumstance, and the ridiculous

I’m a sucker for pomp and circumstance. I like the formality, the sense that such ceremonies carry on traditions, speak to our values. And I like Joe Biden. So it’s no wonder I teared up today when I saw the clip of him tearing up while delivering an eulogy at the Arizona service for John McCain. It was all done in such good taste, with such control, the widow composed as she laid a cool cheek against the casket. And then came Meghan, the daughter, who completely fell apart. Someone remarked that we all grieve in different ways,, and I thought yes, but she should have been given a moment of privacy rather than having her momentary breakdown broadcast to the nation.

By coincidence, I saw a Craig’s List ad for actors in the Phoenix area, with the note that they would be expected to perform some protest activities. Tell me, please, that nobody was hiring people to protest at the funeral. I heard of no such activity.

I have been fascinated, too, with accounts of McCain’s 106-year-old mother. I admire strength, and she is obviously one strong woman. She is expected to attend the services in DC, and I want to wave and say, “I”ll be there too.” For I will, via TV.

I think the pomp and circumstance surrounding this death is particularly important. It points up to the nation that we’ve lost a hero, a man who put country above party and self, a man who embodied the best of what we think of as American values. No, I didn’t always agree with him on issues—he was too militaristic for me, too much of a war hawk, and I didn’t like his stance on abortion. And we won’t even discuss his misbegotten choice of Sarah Palin as a running mate. But I always trusted that the decisions he made came from deep conviction and carefully thought-out positions.

IN death, as in life, he stands in stark contrast to those who would now run our country, and much as I am against politicizing any death, I hope the voters remember this at the polls in November. We must take our country back to save ourselves—and in so doing we can honor John McCain.

And on to the trivia for the day. Remember when the Barnett Shales was discovered, and gas beneath our property was going to make us each a fortune? Yeah, I sort of forgot too. But today I got my annual royalty check--$2.04. Out of my way! I have to get to the bank!