Moving on but never letting go

I sense a subtle shift in mood in the media, maybe even in the people now that Newtown is five days behind us and the absolute shock is wearing off. We have too often grieved over tragedies for a few days, while they were prominent in the media, and then moved on. This time is different. We will never ever forget the children of Sandy Hook, but we are moving on. The media is beginning, slowly of course, to cover other subjects, and the national mood is turning toward dealing with the issues raised by this tragedy.
I read that Senator Diane Feinstein intends to introduce a bill on the first day of the legislative session proposing banning assault rifles and large magazine clips (I may not even get the terminology right here). Some conservatives are also proposing sensible gun control measures, including restoring the ban on assault rifles which Congrees, to their shame, let expire without action.
There is also a lot of attention being paid to mental health. The letter known as "I am Adam Lanza's mother" has gone viral on the internet and the author appeared on the TODAY show. She emphasized the helplessness of families, a feeling I'm sure Nancy Lanza knew only too well as she tried to deal with her disturbed son. Perhaps her mistake (in addition to stockpiling weapons) was to keep her trials a secret. One of the lessons we must learn is to wash away the stigma of mental health. We cannot deal with what is hidden in the closet.
Another facet of the whole problem is raising its head--the violence that pervades our culture on TV and in the movies. I see it in some of my grandchildren who accept violence as a part of life. Too often, on cartoons, they see people shot, fall down, only to rise again. Censorship is an ugly word; self-censorship is strength, but profit and greed too often rules the day.
Of course the past weekend brought out the worst in some people, like the Texas legislator (of course it would be Texas) who proclaimed that what we need is more guns and the people who advocate arming teachers. And then there's the appalling story of a man who said on Sunday, "Get the nigger off TV. We wanat to watch football," when major networks pre-empted programming to show President Obama's talk in Newton. I hope that story isi apocryphal but probably it illustrates that deep vein of hatred that runs throughout our nation.
No, we will never forget but we are beginning to work together toward healing by taking action. I so hope I am not wrong in saying this time we really will look at ourselves as a nation.

Thoughts on Newtown

I didn't blog last night. There was nothing to say, and as one friend put it, I was rattled. There is still nothing to say, nothing we can do to ease the pain of the people of Newtown. We can send prayers and thoughts to those who lost loved ones; we can send donations to the mental health services of Newtown for counseling for survivors. But for a long time, none of it matters. There are families for whom there will be no Christmas this year and life will never again be the same. I cannot wrap my mind around the agony of sending a child off to school and then learning that he or she will never be coming home again.
Almost all that can be said has been said on Facebook--and some that should never be said. Like a declaration that there always has been evil in the world and always will be. Really? Should we just sit back and accept massacres in public places as a fact of life? Or, even worse, the pronouncements that the reason this happened is because there is no prayer in schools. That insults the God I believe in. I do think a moment of quiet in school would be appropriate so that each child could pray or meditate in the religion in which they are being raised. But the folks who bring this up mean Christian prayer, and that is wrong in our increasingly diverse culture. And I was outraged by a columnist who suggested that in his news conference President Obama faked tears. The hatred in this country runs so deep it's no wonder we have mass killings.
Sensible public opinion seems to come down to two things: mental health and gun control. The first is tricky. How do you legislate mental health, which to my mind includes the deep vein of hatred? Apparently we can't rely on family and friends to identify a problem and seek help. But we can't institute laws whereby I could say, "You know, so-and-so isn't acting right" and cause "so-and-so" all kinds of grief. It's called invasion of privacy or violation of civil rights. But somehow we have to get a handle on this problem of young men (for the most part) who harbor such irrational anger at the world that they kill strangers in large numbers.
Gun control is almost easier, except it's not. The NRA and its lobbyists are powerful and have deep pockets. Legislators who tabled consideration of extending the ban on assault weapons should hang their heads in shame. There is no reason for citizens to have assault weapons. Apparently none was used yesterday--I got into a long Facebook thread about what kind of weapon was used, until I finally threw up my hands and asked, "What the hell does it matter? Children are dead." I hope President Obama will show as much courage and determination in dealing with this problem as he is showing about the fiscal cliff. Now is the time for action, while the public is outraged. The NRA has held us hostage long enough.
Personally I would ban all guns, except perhaps hunting rifles, though I was amused today when someone pointed out that hunters only shoot at things who can't shoot back. So do terrorists who kill young children. Yes, there will always be illegal handguns but the more we can control, the better. I was appalled to read this morning that a Texas school district has armed its teachers. Wrong solutioin, so wrong.
Last night I shared a post of statistics about deaths by guns in this country compared to the number in other "civilized" countries. Apparently, the statistics were hopelessly out of date, and I apologize (one of the dangers of Facebook). But it is still true that more people in this country are killed by guns than in any other country in the "civilized" world. Yesterday over twenty school children and a teacher in China were attacked by an assailant weilding a knife. No one died. If that doesn't speak volumes, I don't know what does.
There is still nothing to say. My heart is still broken as I think about the families in Newtown and as I watch six-year-old Jacob decorating a gingerbread man and think how precious he is. That's what this season should be about--joy and wonder--not death and grief that will never go away. No I don't think we as a nation are lost and beyond hope. But I do think it's past time we took a good long look at ourselves and then moved to action.
Happy holidays everyone, and as you hold our loved ones tight, remember the people of Newtown. They will never again be the same, and Christmas will always be bitter for them.