An ongoing and difficult lesson

Fall mums for the coffee table
Sorry about that glass
not sure how it got into the picture

A friend sent me an article on intellectual humility. I asked her if it was a gentle hint about my adamant political postings, but she denied that. Still is made me think about something that comes to the front of my mind every so often—humility, especially online.

A gentleman posted against Build Back Better, and in disagreeing with him, I said “Go ahead. Bury your head in the sand.” Snarky of me, and I knew it. His response also told me so. He said my words said all he needed to know about me as a person. I apologized, we were friends, and then I did it again. I can’t even remember what he said, but I responded, and he replied, “You just can’t let it alone, can you?” That’s the truth. When I see some of the right-wing comments—they don’t even have to be outrageous, just wrong in my opinion—I can’t help countering. I am one of those who believes so firmly that I’m right about everything from national politics to TCU ex-Coach Gary Patterson, that I leap into discussions when I don’t need to.

For some time now when scrolling through Facebook, I’ve been asking myself, when tempted to comment, “Do you really need to insert yourself into that discussion?” Posting your opinion and taking your licks is one thing; jumping on to someone else’s page is altogether another.

I’m trying to teach myself to apologize. Recently a woman posted about Massey’s Restaurant on Lake Worth (I think that’s where it was) and I of course jumped in with, “No. It was on Eighth Avenue.” She replied that it was a different restaurant, and I hastily apologized.

But then today there was a woman who said 1.7 million refugees have been flown to various cities in the dark of the night, without covid testing or vaccination. I asked her for documentation and got in reply, “You’re a fool. Read the news.” I didn’t think that was much documentation, so I asked her why Biden would allow unvaccinated immigrants when vaccination has been one of his biggest priorities. And I sent her a graph that showed the 1.7 million figure was for sixty years. No response.

Some of the conspiracy theories are so ridiculous that it’s hard to keep your tongue—or your fingers from the keyboard. But of course, those are the very people we shouldn’t argue with, because it’s a waste of breath and in some sense reduces us to their level. So I’m trying not to spout off at the ridiculous people, but to engage politely with those I think might be open to discussion. It’s a hard line to draw and a hard lesson to learn.

A little part of my obsession traces to my faith. We are taught to testify for our faith. I feel a moral obligation to testify for social and political welfare. If the recipient is not moved, perhaps others will be. Remember the poem by Martin Niemöller, “First they came for the Communists….” It vividly makes the point about not remaining silent in the face of outrages. I’d welcome any thoughts and responses.

On a much lighter note, I had a bone density test today and, if I’m reading the results right, I passed. Whoopee! I didn’t want to have to do those nose drops. And I went to the grocery store with Jordan, driving the cart behind her. Fun—she’d pick something up, and I’d point out we have three in the fridge/freezer, or she’d tell me, “You’re out of this. You just don’t know it.” Came home with a lovely bunch of mums for the coffee table.

Tonight a fancy happy hour celebrating neighbor Prudence’s completion of her MBA degree. How she did that while parenting four children, home-schooling two or three of them, running the house for a surgeon/husband (been there, done that, and it ain’t easy) is beyond me. Kudos to her. We had roses for her and champagne for everyone.

Jordan's charcuterie for Prudence

A good day.