This, that, and a gullywasher

Cousins are your first and best friends forever!

For the second night in a row, the gods were bowling in the wee hours of the morning. Then came sheets of rain. About seven it cleared but remained dark, and just in time for the school rush across the street the heavens opened again. Jordan called for a big umbrella and I put it out; then she called wonderig what to do about her feet--she didnt want to spend the day with wet feet. She finally did what was for us a first: she let him out right by the door next to his classroom. Always the anxious grandmother, I asked if we should call and be sure he was in class. "Mom, I watched him go in the door, and then I watched to be sure no one carried him out." I suppose child-snatchers weren't out in the storm anyway.

This afternoon was my last day to pick Jacob up, and he's staying late, so I decided I had to do my yoga with him here. He suggested I do it in the front room so as not to disturb his TVwatching; I suggested he watch TV in my office so as not to disturb my yoga. That didn't please him, so he watched me do my yoga, imitated me some. When I was in the meditation phase at the end, he demanded, "Juju, are you doing yoga or are you just sleeping?" I'm going to miss him in the afternoons. Then again, maybe I won't have to watch any more Bigfoot videos.

I've been too social this week--Monday night playing catch-up from a weekend away, Tuesday night dinner with the neighbors at the Grill--a chunk out of the evening; Wed. night dinner with friends at a wine cafe--a bigger chunk out of the evening and my wallet both. Tonight I'm staying home, eating a BLT, and working. Was all ready to start tht next Kelly O'Connell novel, but I got final proofs for the third one today. Sigh. The weekend doesn't offer lots of work time. I imagine I'll be running errands, etc.

Retirement sure is fun!

My cup runneth over--and so did my eyes

I left my daughter's house this afternoon about 1:30 with my vision blurred by tears that kept leaking out--tears of joy, happiness, overwhelming love. I had such a good morning with all my children and grandchildren. Jordan fixed a huge brunch, and people ate whenever they wandered in. Gorgeous day so we sat  on the patio, while the kids played in the yard. There was, of course, the occasional accidental injury and the one who tattled on another, but they were so happy and were having such a good weekend. I had b'day presents for all those with April and May birthdays I'd missed or would miss, and after those were opened, my wonderful children surprised me with an iPad.
Of course, I had just finished putting my foot in my mouth by announcing that I had really decided that I would get myself a Kindle Fire. An iPad, I proclaimed knowingly, wouldn't fit in my purse (it will, 'cause I carry big purses). So there was much teasing, but they were all so excited to give it to me and get me started with it, telling me over and over how much I'll use it. And I will--I'm thrilled with it already, though some of the things Jamie taught me have already leaked out of my brain. But I want to put more blogs on my reading list and add more magazines--cooking magazines--to my bookshelf.
Not sure if it was the iPad, the hugs and love (more likely) or the culmination of the glorious family weekend we've had that caused those tears to leak out, but they did. I am so thankful for my family.
Of course they all partied and hung out until after four. I would have stayed but they should not give me wine at eleven o'clock in the morning. I went into this hectic, exciting weekend already tired and am now thoroughly exhuasted but in oh such a good way.
I came home, thinking I'd get my dogs fed, Jamie et al would come for their stuff, and I'd get a good long nap. Foiled on all counts. Jamie's dog was in the backyard, so I could hardly feed Scooby out there. Mozby is such a love though and so anxious to please that I eventually brought both my dogs in and gave Mozby treats for good behavior. Should have taken my nap when I got home--it was five before the Frisco Alters got here to pack up belongings and dogs, and five-thirty before I got my nap, so naturally it was an abbreviated one.
Early to bed tonight. I say that and then I got involved in something, and it's as late as always. Last night it was eleven-thirty, but my Austin grandsons wake up bright and early and noisy--no amount of shushing convinces them about indoor voices, so I was up at six-forty-five and making cinnamon pull-apart bread shortly after that.
Mother's Day thoughts--about my mom, the moms of others, and myself as a mom have been rattling around in my mind all week but I'll save them for a belated post-Mother's Day blog tomorrow. Meantime, I am counting my blessings, four wonderful children who married equally wonderful people and produced seven lovely grandchildren. And then there's that larger family with whom we spent yesterday and who are equally a blessing. Hope I can live up to all this.
Here's a picture from yesterday of my Houston kids and grandkids--last night I thought I'd lost it on the computer but I found it this morning. They're gorgeous, all of them. Kegan, my youngest grandchld, will suffer himself to be hugged but he does little to cooperate. Must be hard being the youngest in such a bunch.  Morgan is much more affectionate, having overcome some shyness she felt as a younger child.

A visit with family

I never blog beforehand when I'm going away. It strikes me as waving a banner that says, "Hey, my house is empty. Come on by," even though my house isn't totally empty. There are two dogs and the pet sitter is in and out. But in the last few days a few may have caught hints that I wasn't in my usual place.
I was in Houston with my oldest son, Colin, his wife, Lisa, and their two children--seven-year-old Morgan and four-and-a-half -year-old Kegan. I did all those grandmotherly things that I probably don't do enough with Jacob--I see him almost every day, and I rarely see these children. I think that made me more conscious of being an attentive grandparent. I went to gymnastics and a soccer game, and I listened to Morgan read her two short books every night. In truth I was impressed with her reading, though she has to work a bit on intonaton and expression:-) While they were at school and at work, I did a lot on my chili book, did my yoga each day, and was quite domestic--emptying and re-loading the dishwasher (the first time I emptied it and shelved unwashed dishes, so after that we had to clarify), made a pot of chili one night, two batches of brownies another day, not sure what all but one day it was noon before I got to my own work. Colin came home and asked, "You weren't bored?" and I assured him not. Colin is a controller for five golf courses and Lisa teaches 7th grade math, the children are in day care, and everyone is gone until 6:30 at night. And they're all in bed by 8:30--I had a two-hour visiting window.
These are children I don't see as much of and the little one has been really shy about hugging me--or allowing me to hug him. We broke that barrier this time, to my great joy, and both children clamored for my attention, hugged me goodnight, told me about their day. It was a delight. Lisa said tonight she thinks it's better when it's just me rather than all the family, and she's probably right. That doesn't happen often, but now I will have to make it happen more often with those children and with daughter Megan's Austin sons.

Colin took me from Kingwood--north of Houston where they live--one day to the Omni Galleria for a lunch with my former colleagues from A&M and associated presses. It was a real treat for me to see everyone and to show off my handsome son, though he expected a "luncheon" and got a box lunch. Good thing I convinced him he didn't have to wear a suit. Today, he hauled me and my baggage back down to the Omni. The baggage was much condensed because I didn't want to go into the hotel looking like the Joads had arrived. Still he took it up to the second floor, then down to the parking garage to stash in Melinda's car, and then came up to return her key and ask, "Are you okay now?" I rely on Colin, his steadfastness and his strength, a whole lot, poor boy. But I love him dearly.
Another delight of being out of my routine and element: for the first time in several weeks, I was able to pick up a book and lose myself in it. I'd saved Deborah Crombie's No Mark Upon Her for this trip, and I got a good start on it. Now, of course I don't want to do anything but read--and a few other things do call. But she is quite simply an exceptional writer. A Texan, she has the British lingo down pat, from car park for parking lot to the expletive "Sod him!" In this book, she ventures into the world of competitive rowing, with its own peculiar language and customs and does a triumphant job. I'm a great fan and love reading the book.
Now I'm back home, with dogs to feed and love, groceries to buy, errands to run, meals to cook--the whole nine yards. But I'll find time to keep reading.
And Morgan delighted me as I left today by asking, "Can we face time with you?" Of course she can, sweet thing. I'm feeling like a happy grandmother tonight.

The Alter family stock show day

The Alter family stock show day was a long day. There's  no other way to put it. It's become a tradition that we all tour the stock show grounds the day after the children and their families go to the rodeo--I have long since given it up, though I used to love it. This year, of course, we were missing my four children who are in Califoirnia for a memorial for their father. But the rest of us, mostly, remained undaunted. Colin's wife has a bronchial infection and didn't want to make the drive from Houtson with two kids. But Brandon and his boys came last night, and Mel and the girls arrived today after getting stuck in horrible traffic and spending two and a half hours in the car between Frisco and Fort Worth.
But about 1:30 we headed for the stock show--and we didn't get home until 5:15. That, my friends, is a long day on your feet. This being the last weekend of the show, our visit to the livesetock barns was fruitless--they were empty. We did tour the barn where the winning cattle were--hot, smelly, close atmosphere but interesting, and the kids loved the baby cattle. Then we headed for the midway. I have to be honest: the midway holds nothing but negative appeal for me except for watching my grandchildren have fun. I get tired, grouchy, and, today, cold as the sun faded and the wind picked up. It did have its high moments--Edie won two stuffed fish, and Jacob won a live goldfish; Maddie, Brandon and the Hudgeons boys rode the Ferris wheel, and Maddie and her mom rode The Big Kuhauna. Edie, it turns out, is her grandmother's child and doesn't like rides, though she did some fun and horror house things. Jacob loved some rides, didn't like the others so much. On one, called the Avalanche, people sit in a row and the whole backdrop rotates up and back--looked harmless, but Christian said it had a free fall sort of feeling and Jacob didn't like it at all. There were several most of the adults agreed we would never  try.

My reaction? Too much midway, not enough animals--we missed the FFA exhibit with the baby chicks and ducks and by the time we got back to it we were too tired. We missed the exhibits with western furniture, clothing, jewely, and TV kind of food and cooking products. All the parts I love best. Next year I'll rethink this. And next year: note to self, wear walking shoes, not tennis shoes.

We relaxed over dinner at Joe T. Garcia's, but even then three little boys, ages seven and five, can get into enormous mischief and trouble. So now we're all home. Mel, bless her, has taken all the kids out to the apartment, Christian didn't go to dinner with us--another party, which is a long story--but he came by and we re-hashed the day.
My house is quiet--hmm. That makes me a bit nervous. Guess I'll go investigate, but we are done, tired, sleepy, all those things.

Generations

A friend is devastated because her son is moving to Portland, Oregon, and taking his eight-year-old son with him, her only grandchild I think. I have seven grandchildren, but only one is local, and I see a lot of him. If his parents moved halfway across the country, I know I'd be devastated too. Her plight got me to thinking about the differences between children and grandchildren.
I remember babysitting Jacob one night when he was seven or eight months old. He had a dream and woke screaming. I sat in the rocker, crooning to him and holding him close. He cuddled up close to me and after a moment fell asleep. I sat there holding that sleeping baby on my chest for an hour, realizing this was an opportunity I didn't get much anymore.
When you have children,  you are the focus of their world in a way that grandparents can never be. If they're upset, scared, in pain--they want Mommy. I loved those years. I remember watching one of my children run a block with his arms spread to get the hug I offered from my knees. More than once, I've listened to Jacob scream, "I want Mommy!" A couple of times I've called her and we've talked strategy a bit. We don't want to have her or Daddy come get him and set a precedent. Sometimes ice cream makes it all better, and once a Lunchable saved the day--or night. He dried his tears and said, "Juju, you are the best!" I thought, "Yeah, 'cause I'm feeding you faux food." But grandparents have to realize we can never be in the same place as Mommy or Daddy.
Being a grandparent has problems too--the old saying is that they go home and someone else worries about them. That's not always true--we worry as much as parents, we deal with tantrums and tears and laughter and jumping on beds. We track their height and weight and wonder if they're walking, talking early enough, doing everything on schedule. We wring our hands over whether or not they're eating properly--and feel we can't speak. Half the time my daughter tells me I let him get away with too much and the other half she says, "I'm not going to worry about that." Fortunately we're good friends, and I can voice my opinion.
But we're different. If we do it right, we're fun in a way Mom and Dad aren't. We aren't as harried and hassled as parents who work full time and raise children. Yes, we let them get away with things--watch a little extra TV, stay up a little later at night. We take them places Mom doesn't have time for, they know we'll pick them up at day care or school if need be. At my house, Jacob can play with dogs and a cat that he doesen't have at home--at five he's just learning to be comfortable with the dogs and is proud of himself. He can watch TV while he eats his dinner--I know, I never let my children do that.  Grandparents really are for spoiling children and loving children unconditionally.
I wish my six other grandchildren lived close enough that I could see them several times a week. Each is so special in his or her own way, and I'm so proud of them. But not seeing them as often makes the relationship different, especially with little ones.
Jacob was here for lunch today, waiting for his other grandparents to pick him up for a cousin's birthday party. My Aussie was loving on him, and he said indignantly, "I'm going to a birthday party. I can't go all slobbered!"