Sometimes the tedium of days makes me want to cower in bed, which I know is not the answer. But even though I have work to do, books to read, the routine of my days gets to me. Brush teeth, wash hair, eat breakfast, and work at my desk—some days, not feeling pushed, I spend way too much of the morning on Facebook. The ultimate in escapism. Today was one of those days.
Because I’m compulsive, I beat myself up a lot about not being productive. I wrote 1000 words on a new manuscript earlier in the week—and quit, because it just didn’t seem to come alive on the page. I have some ideas about how to fix that first thousand words—and I can’t move on until I do that. But I find myself reading a book or doing anything to distract. I have an older titles of mine to proofread so I can get it back up on Amazon. Do I do it? Nope. I diddle and fiddle. It really bothers me.
Friends came tonight to bring me supper, and we had a good long, jolly visit. Then Jacob arrived and announced he was hungry, so Teddy took him to the Old Neighborhood Grill to get a cheese quesadilla. Jacob sat and chatted like an adult—so proud of him.
Jordan is coming back tonight to make salads for our salad buffet tomorrow night, but it’s 8:30---her car is in the driveway but I don’t know where she went. Think I saw Christian’s car too so perhaps they’ve gone somewhere. Getting close to my bedtime, so I may not be much good at making salads—or directing her.
Kind of a downer post tonight, and I’m sorry. But I am so worried about my doctor appointment Tuesday, afraid my ankle is not healing. Trying to teach myself, “What will be will be.” Somehow when I tried to type the original que sera, sera, it came out in Greek letters. Is that an omen?
Tomorrow is a new day.